Honoring Mother’s Day When Your Mom Is Gone

by Tom Musbach on May 1, 2012

in Relationships

Mother’s Day is usually a joyful occasion, but it can bring pain and sadness for those whose mothers are no longer with us.

While you can’t make Mother’s Day go away, you can be creative and honor the day in a manner that’s appropriate for your situation. It doesn’t have to be about flowers and Sunday brunch.

Old photo of a stylish mother standing outside of an apartment building (Photo: Flickr/Flashbacks.com)

Photo: Flickr/Flashbacks.com

“Mother’s Day should be a time of remembrance, and not a time of grief,” said Debra Hammond, a relationships columnist and expert on JustAnswer.

Activities to honor your mother’s memory

Hammond and another expert on JustAnswer, CoachJenK, offered suggestions that can make Mother’s Day special even if you can’t spend time with your mother.

Talk with others and accept their support. Sharing how you feel can help others understand and possibly comfort you. Or you can use a popular Web site like Facebook where you can post little messages or memories so that others can interact and support you.

Pass it along. If you have a really good story or memory about your mother, share it with loved ones. Or if she had a favorite recipe that she always made for you, make that recipe and share the food with others as a way to honor your mother’s memory.

If you are a parent, appreciate your own children. Spend some cherished time with your children and notice the love in their eyes when they look at you. “Remind yourself that many of your wonderful traits and traditions have been passed to you by your Mom and feel proud for carrying on these wonderful ways,” said CoachJenK.

Re-create a special activity. For example, if you played tennis together, make sure to play on that day. “Go play tennis and look up toward the sky and breathe and feel your Mom with you and in you,” CoachJenK said.

Write it down. Spend some time writing in a journal as a way to reflect about your mother’s influence on your life. You’ll find some good prompts for getting started in this article at the Grieving Toolbox.

The foundation you can build on

Remembering all the wonderful moments and events you shared with your mother can be a great way to cope with the loss and keep her memory alive, said Debra Hammond.

“This day is for everyone to remember a mother’s love, a mother’s dedication, and a day that we should appreciate our mothers forever.”

More articles from JustAnswer:

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