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Holiday time is upon us and it comes with many wonderful events, parties and family get togethers. We look forward to this time each year, but are often caught in situations that present itself with difficulties. If the holiday season is supposed to be a time of cheer and joy, then why can it be so difficult to get through this period? Well, it is because the very same events that are supposed to spread joy and cheer can place undue demands on all of us.
It can be tough to negotiate these events on our own, but even with our loved one on our arm, they can be very challenging times. As we negotiate each party with our spouse or partner we encounter new people, family and friends. And to make matters even more complicated, each event may require us to wear a different persona. The office party with your spouse’s co-workers may be quite different than a holiday dinner at your partner’s home with family. The last thing anyone needs is undue stress in their relationship during holiday time.
There are a few things to remember that can help get through the holiday period with ease and with your relationship healthy and intact.
1- Be Yourself: There is nothing worse than acting in a way that embarrasses you or your partner at a party. Even if you believe this new persona is required, it is better to be consistent with whom you are and who your partner knows you to be than to take on the personality of the event. As an example, if you are demure in nature and soft spoken and you attend your partner’s office holiday party which typically gets rowdy, I would not suggest you jump on the bar and begin dancing and getting wild. Although it might seem like a great idea at the time, please remember that your partner has enjoyed you for your soft spoken ways. To act outside your comfort zone is a risk and one that may not be worth taking at a large event. You can get wild, if you desire, at another time when it is just the two of you.
2- Don’t flirt with others: This may sound like a no-brainer, but you would be surprised just how often this occurs at holiday parties. You may feel like you are just playing along with the drunken one fawning all over you, but this will most likely cause anger from your partner and cause a major rift between the two of you.
3- Don’t abandon your partner: If your partner is attending one of your events, especially if they don’t know many, don’t abandon them while you work the room. Take them with you and introduce and include them. Once they feel comfortable they may be on their own, but it is important to stay close and connected.
4-Don’t use your partner’s event as a way to network or social climb: This will put an end to the relationship very quickly. When we attend our partner’s events, we are in the supporting role and not the spotlight. I am not suggesting that you act dim witted and silent, but this would not be the time to chat it up with others in order to get a job in the company or further your own growth. Sure, talk about your successes in business, but not as a way to climb the social or corporate ladder.
5- Have Fun: Oh right, remember that? Throw caution to the wind and let yourself relax and enjoy the events, meeting new people and supporting your partner. This will deepen your connection and get you through the holiday season with relative ease.
Although the holiday season can be stressful, there are things that you can do to make it wonderful. Relax, have fun, be yourself and support your partner. If you do, you are sure to have the most wonderful time of the year.